Now that I have my medications back within my system, I have been able to sleep better, think a bit more clearly. I’ve been drawing much more lately, I’ve seemed to have gone back to my tribal drawing roots… I have improved rather well.
We’re all counting down the days to January… we all really want to go back and see Gail. Gail has requested we go twice a week for a time, mostly due to the fact I’ve sadly regressed a bit. She says it’s not my fault, we are the last first world developed country without nationwide health care… or socialized as some would call it. I wasn’t surprised, with the way people with mental health are treated within this country, and how uneducated people seem to be about it, I’m just… not shocked in the slightest.
I was out with my father and Merlin yesterday. With Merlin it seems easier to be around him… which is nice. Sadly because of my mothers dog, I can’t have him, thus only being able to be around her for at most 3 or 4 hours. We ran to the pharmacy that had his compression socks, and went to eat lunch. I laid out Merlin’s blanket (because I really didn’t think the floor was clean…) and he went under the table and laid down in it. He was quite, bothering no one.
We were approached by some teenagers, who started on and on about how I am the reason why service dogs are given a bad rap, and how he was a fake service dog because I didn’t ‘look sick’. My father started to get into it with them, and I was stuck in a booth… Merlin got up onto the booths seat, and laid himself over me, making a barrier from me and them. When one of the kids tried to touch me, he barked once.
The cops who came in for lunch, intervened, all 3 cops laughed at the teenagers claims and said “You see what he’s doing to his handler? That’s called blocking… you’re doing something that’s forcing the dog to feel it’s safer for him to be in between you and her. Just because you can’t see an illness doesn’t mean it’s not there.”
That was the most amazing thing I had heard in a while. another cop was talking to my dad who, of course, was all fired up. and the female cop sat with me outside while my panic attack set in. Thanks to Merlin, I avoided switching. She saw pretty quickly I had PTSD of some kind because of the after effects… she said her husband has PTSD from his childhood, not the military, and has a service dog as well, so she understood what I was going through. It made me feel more at ease. We sat outside until I was calm enough to go back inside. When I did, Merlin was body blocking, placing himself in between me and the 3 teenagers. They apologized, the cops explained they were going to take them to the station and have there parents come get them there. They wanted to know if I wanted to press charges, I said no. There was no point too, from what I could hear when the teens called there parents, none where pleased with what they did. I think that’s enough.
When I got home, I had to crash, the stress seemed to drain everything I had. Emily wanted a piece, Una wanted a piece, Xero freaked out, Alice and Rina where being comforted by Vera… Z wanted a piece, Rin was crying, Lucy didn’t seem to care…. it’s like a giant mess when things like this happen. I didn’t tell my husband yet, mostly because he’ll get angry, but also he acts like he should of been there; however honestly I doubt him being there would of changed much. My dad called me about 40 times to make sure I was okay after I got home, so it’s one of those things to where more people there might of made it worse…
Sometimes I wish people here were more educated about service dogs, mental health… just… everything. Sometimes I wonder if moving to a different country would be better, but I can’t really just pack up and go. With how our country is right now, getting a passport costs an arm and a leg, then trying to leave costs half your soul.
maybe I should carry a squirt bottle and spray people when they say stupid things, then say ‘Bad! Bad human!’
Ahhhh if only…