Smile In Your Sleep

The last few nights have been a bit hard. Emily has been extremely restless, getting up multiple times, etc.
Last night was the first night in 3 nights she was able to sleep, so I’m a bit relieved. We’re going to my mothers for Christmas eve, luckily it shouldn’t be to bad. Her and I had a weird heart to heart yesterday, mostly about her living conditions with my brother, and how he treats her, but we also had a nice heart to heart about us, my illnesses and such.
We both cried, it was… interesting.
I’m very proud of her, I just hope she can indeed put her foot down on how my brother treats her… despite everything I’ve been through, she’s still our mother, I want her to have quality of life.

Anyways, this will be extremely short, but I at least wanted to wish you all Happy Holidays, and I hope there wonderful ^_^

From us to you.


New Adventures

Today we decided to try something new, and attended an American Style Tribal Belly Dance class that is taught by my mentor and close friend. She helped me achieve high school graduation, and taught me that it’s okay to not have a good day, but that shouldn’t stop me from achieving what I want.
At first, it was extremely weird. I’m not nearly as flexible nor do I have the stamina, but it was quite fun.
The only thing that really rubbed me the wrong way was one of the advanced students came over to grab something out of her bag, then muttered under her breathe ‘This class is full of a bunch of rhinos.’
There were a few woman in the class that had curves, but I wasn’t understanding why that was such a huge issue. They still looked better then most oversized people. It made me extremely self conscious of my own body image, and caused me to sit out. At the end, my teacher when helped me through school approached me, we hugged and talked. Then she asked why I was sitting out on the end, and I told her what I heard, and how it made me feel overweight.

I am not sure what will happen, but she smiled at me and said ‘so am I, but I think having meat on us makes us sexy.’ It made me smile again, and she invited me to come back and join her beginner classes.
After discussing with my siblings, I plan too. Despite the rather negativity I experienced, my teacher assured me, that kind of disrespect isn’t tolerated and is dealt with quickly and quietly. Her classes are safe spaces for anyone to come and learn how to dance, something she has great passion in.
It will be good to have a hobby outside of the house… seems now all I do is stay home and do things within the safety of our home. It will be good for all of us to branch a little, besides Khala is all excited about the outfits, makeup, and other things she is happy to help with. I’m glad she seems interested in something other then… well… her normal stuff.